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Stay disciplined, not obsessed

 

I've been here before, I know the feeling......sixteen times before I've questioned why I do this sport around 3-4 weeks out from Ironman race day. 

That final prep in the Ironman journey is always a tough time. 

Whereas my previous racing block (three 70.3's in 7 weeks) kept the motivation high for training, the past three weeks have been all about embracing the grind. I'm extremely thankful that I have not had any physical setbacks since the summer of 2019 and after 15 years, I am still passionate about long distance triathlon training and racing. A lot of that comes from having such a great playground for biking and running. But that doesn't mean that this last training block was smooth sailing. 

There was self-doubt, there was fatigue, there was soreness and there were some niggles. But through it all, I've been consistently showing up and letting my body and mind work out their differences. However, on Friday last week, my body said "not today" and my mind agreed. I enjoyed the entire day off from any type of exercise and it felt amazing. It's funny how life gives you recovery days when you need them the most. 

As I countdown the weeks until Ironman #17, I can't help but think about the discipline that is needed to train for a 140.6 mile event. It takes a lot of focus, resiliency and persistence. While the motivation is high at the beginning, you really have to keep your "why" in mind when the real fatigue sets in. 

Every athlete needs a high level of dedication, passion, desire and commitment in order to perform at a high level or to physically meet the demands of a long distance race. For many athletes, the motivation to athletically succeed is borderline obsession. Since training for an athletic event may resemble excessive exercise, you may forget your "why" and instead, be grinding along with an unhealthy obsession.

For every athlete, it can be difficult to understand whether or not your discipline and struggle is "normal." 

Since training requires placing intentional training stress on the body, it's important to recognize that something is not "normal" when training becomes unenjoyable and instead, feels like a chore or obligation.

Training for an Ironman should not be combined with feeling the need to control everything - from metrics to body weight. I've learned a lot from Ironman distance racing and one thing comes to mind - you can't control what happens during a 140.6 mile event. For the athlete who is seeking performance gains, it's completely normal to be disciplined to your training. Persistence and consistency are two sure ways to gain fitness and confidence for race day.

However, tying self-worth to physical performance and/or a body image, while obsessively comparing your fitness, metrics or body image to another athlete (or a past version of yourself) is a sign that training is an obsession. 

As a sport dietitian who often works with athletes who are experiencing the negative mental, emotional and physical consequences of severely altering the diet and training excessively in route to an ultra endurance event, it's important to explore the shift, when a natural desire to be better turns obsessive and excessive.

Passion turned obsession

  • Overexercising to the point that fulfilling sport-related goals become more important than almost anything else in life.
  • Training is specifically used to control body weight.
  • Training provides a sense of power, control and self-respect.
  • Constant obsession with food and weight.
  • Refusal to miss a workout no matter what.
  • Difficulty/inability scaling back workouts due to sickness, injury, fatigue or poor sleep.
  • Conflicts between family, friends, kids and/or training partners or feeling alienated.
  • Anxiety and guilt when a workout is missed or if exercise volume isn't high "enough".
  • Little to no enjoyment for exercise, but continues to train/exercise anyways.
  • Haphazard training with little structure/quality to training.
  • Self-worth is tied to physical performance, race results, training metrics or body image.
  • Constant comparison to other athletes (ex. Strava, social media).
  • Lack of satisfaction with personal achievements.
  • Rigid food rules and dietary restriction.
  • Feeling out of control in many areas of life.
  • Denial that there is a problem.
  • Never feeling good enough.
Understanding that it is very difficult to differentiate between "disciplined" and "obsessive," I encourage you to explore your current lifestyle (and mindset) to determine whether your current eating patterns and training regime is serving you well. Yes, you will need to make a few extra sacrifices at times in your long distance training journey but the global context of race day readiness should not feel like an addiction. 

To get to the root of your "why" explore your feelings of self acceptance and athletic worthiness to understand if your body image struggles and/or exercise obsession is tied to your body image, lack of self-believe or poor self-esteem.

Training for an athletic event should be a challenging. It's not going to always be easy. But it should also be a fun and enjoyable experience for your body, AND for those around you, who care, love and support you. Sport does not discriminate among body types or fitness levels. If you have recently found yourself paying more attention to your appearance, metrics or race goal than to your own health or enjoyment of the process, your desire to become a better athlete may have shifted into an unhealthy obsession. Too much of anything can be negative so it's important to be able to differentiate between an unhealthy addiction to exercises versus a healthy discipline to train.