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Healthy coping during stressful times

In today’s fast-paced, stressful and unpredictable world, it’s important to have a toolbox of healthy coping mechanisms. A coping mechanism is something that helps you deal with something that is difficult or uncomfortable. Truth be told, nearly every coping mechanism can provide a benefit. However, some coping mechanisms have negative consequences associated with them.

For example, do you often reach for a beer, glass of wine or hard liquor to help unwind after a long or stressful day of work? What does your alcohol consumption look like in social situations or during difficult times? Alcohol functions to slow down the central nervous system, helping you feel more relaxed. It also reduces inhibition, memory and judgement. For many people, having a drink is the easiest way to deal with something that is uncomfortable or to distance from a stressor or challenge. As a result, alcohol becomes a crutch and barrier to developing more effective and healthy coping strategies.

Another example is using food as a coping mechanism. Individuals vulnerable to an eating disorder often experience circumstances in life where they feel trapped, a loss of control or pressure to succeed. Food is used as a coping mechanism to help gain control and as a way to relieve stress. Whether it's overeating (ex. binging) or restricting (anorexia), controlling food and the body provides a false sense of safety. Sadly, once trapped within the eating disorder, people struggle with how to live without it. They don't know who they are without it or how to cope without it. There's often a "voice" that is problematic and disruptive, causing a great feeling of helplesness. This negative and controlling voice can distort logic, make threats, be overly critical and demanding and can make it incredibly difficult to trust your own decisions and abilities. 

With the unpredictability, stress and external pressures of life, you may be experiencing a wide range of difficult emotions. Some of which are familiar but others may be new to you and thus, extremely uncomfortable. If you've lived a life of pushing away uncomfortable feelings, it may be incredibly unnatural to come face to face with your emotions. Learning how to embrace these inner demons or dark emotions is the first step to coping with stress, anxiety, worry and fear more successfully.

Currently we are all experiencing great stress. Even though we've been given a temporary reset and an opportunity to be creative and to slow-down, nothing is easy about our new normal. If you have recently found yourself overwhelmed with life's stressors, it's time to do some soul-searching to determine if you have been self-medicating with drugs, alcohol, excessive exercise, overspending, avoidance, overeating or some other type of instant gratification or temporary emotional relief. Just because a strategy helps you endure emotional pain, it doesn’t mean it’s healthy.

Whether it's food, spending, exercise, drugs or alcohol, it's very easy to become addicted to something, especially when it's used as a means to cope or to escape complex emotions. To cope in a productive way, it's important to first understand the root of the problem - which situations, traumas or emotions are driving you toward your unhealthy coping mechanism. Learning how to handle stress, anxiety or any other uncomfortable emotion - without the use of drugs, alcohol, food, exercise or spending - is healthy and positive for the mind, body and soul.

I’m incredible grateful to my best friend and amazing Licensed Clinical & Sport Psychologist Dr. Gloria Petruzzelli for sharing her knowledge on this topic and why we need to face our emotions head-on while developing healthy coping skills.