Karel and I had moved from Jacksonville, FL to Greenville, SC. in early May of 2014 and my parents were planning to move from New Port Richey, FL to Greenville in the fall. I remember talking to my dad on the phone the day before he suddenly stopped breathing in the hospital. I told him how much I was loving Greenville, SC. It was memorial weekend and I climbed Cesar's Head for the first time on my tri bike (6 mile climb). I was so excited to tell him what I did. We also went to Lake Jocassee to swim and run and I couldn't wait for him to see the pictures from our weekend.
After 10 months of a heroic and challenging fight with a rare cancer, my dad lost his battle. On May 28th, 2014, my dad was taken off life support in a Tampa hospital. The last 24 hours of my dad's life replays in my mind every year on May 28th.
Every anniversary since his passing has been a day full of sadness, wishing he was still alive. With the heartache of his passing is remembering the funny, kind, helpful, caring and smart man that was my dad.
There have been so many instances when I would think to myself "I wish dad was here."
I wish he could help me with house projects and landscaping ideas. He was so crafty and creative and could fix anything. Everyone who met my dad liked him. My dad was a great man. He had a way of making a difference in the life of others just by being in his presence.
I feel so grateful and happy in life right now and I also find myself missing my dad more intensely than ever. With every milestone or adventure I feel sad that he is not here to share and enjoy it with me.
When my dad passed away, I was given the most difficult challenge of my life - to live life without my dad. Although my dad may not know it today, his passing taught me how to be brave. I am not afraid to fail. I am not afraid to try new things. I am not afraid to feel vulnerable. I am not afraid to ask for help. I am not afraid to admit when I am wrong. I am not afraid to struggle. I am not afraid to move forward in life, despite the uncertainty.
My life has changed so much since my dad passed away. With my 42nd birthday approaching in three days, I think back to the past ten years which have been filled with adventure, travel, success, setbacks and first-time experiences. I wish my dad could see the now me but all I have is memories of us together in my first 31 years of life. However, I know that I am who I am today because of my dad my life and because he passed away.
Blogs about my dad:
Happy Birthday dad (2008)
Living in Greenville, a dream come true
Celebrating more than 32 years of life
One year ago
Finding the right words this Thanksgiving
Thanksgiving feels different and that's ok
Miss you dad
Dear Dad
Father's Day tribute to my dad
Dad's 73rd birthday
Dad's 75th birthday
Dad's 76th birthday